With its electrifying energy, NO HANDS makes for a fiercely entertaining and nostalgic hip-hop experience.

Release date: June 7, 2024 | Independent | Facebook | Artist Website

We’re a few weeks into summer now, and if you’re by chance searching for a rager of an album to keep your spirits up during the high heat index and construction traffic, look no further as I have just the thing for you. Joey Valence & Brae’s NO HANDS is a bombastic record that is rooted in east coast hip hop but with a modern twist in its hyper-energetic bravado and comedic nostalgia. The musical execution coupled with the unwavering confidence makes for an utterly entertaining experience that can instantly whip almost anyone out of a foul mood.

Before we get into it, let me quickly take you back to the flood of memories that NO HANDS re-immersed me in: The bell just rang out on the last day of middle (or junior high) school and summer break has officially begun. I can finally fully indulge the desire to do absolutely nothing but play video games straight through when the sun sets and rises again. With zero responsibilities to worry about, it couldn’t be a better time to get the squad together and power up the Xbox 360. I have stockpiled my double XP codes for this precise moment and am loaded up on Mountain Dew Game Fuel. Life is good.

The first few tracks of NO HANDS had me feeling like the food critic in Ratatouille once that signature dish first touched his tongue and engulfed his taste buds. The music here took me back to when times were much simpler and it is something that I’ve latched onto, or rather latched onto me. While it is fully intentional that Joey Valence & Brae elicit this mental time travel on the listener through their heavily nostalgic music and throwback aesthetic, it’s executed in such a way that is representative of music today.

You’ll notice near instantly that NO HANDS exudes nothing but vivaciousness and spunk. With a rebellious attitude reminiscent of the Beastie Boys, the overall cheekiness and diversity in instrumentals/beats akin to BROCKHAMPTON’s SATURATION III, and buttery smooth, direct vocal delivery ala RUN-DMC, not having fun with this record would be inhuman. Joey Valence & Brae just have this contagious type of charm that they may as well be violently coughing right into my mouth, but they aren’t and that’s what is impressive.

The biggest strengths of this record are the variety in the beats/instrumentals/samples and the transitions between said beats mid-song. It’s an absolute blast going between grungy, hyper-aggressive beats as heard in “LIKE A PUNK” that make me want to commit mild acts of hypothetical vandalism to full on rave-mode later on in the same short song. Then we have other tracks such “THE BADDEST” that sound as if it came straight off my dad’s ‘Miami Club Mix’ from the 90’s. Meanwhile other tracks, such as “OK”, dial it back a bit and focus more on laid back grooves in a style that is akin to BBNO$’s beats. All in all, there’s a multitude of throwback beats with the polish and technical know-how of today, making for a highly cathartic joyride.

Lyrically, it is obvious that this album was intended to be silly and not take itself seriously by any means, and that was what initially drew me into the record; came for the tomfoolery but stayed for the beats and the energy. There are droves of references-a-plenty to various pieces of media, lots of car models, and also meme culture (i.e the ‘bing chillin‘ line in “JOHN CENA”) that I feel like I’m watching an episode of Family Guy as every line is some sort of joke meant for someone to get the reference to. I absolutely cannot fail to mention the savage Danny Brown feature on “PACKAPUNCH”, which it goes exactly as you’d expect, because Danny fucking Brown; a feature I wasn’t expecting but one I welcome with open arms (ears).

Two of my favorite lines include ‘Was always a misfit, teachers like thongs always up in my business’ (“NO HANDS”) and ‘Pourin’ up so much sauce, I think I was a fuckin’ stromboli in my past life’ (“PACKAPUNCH”); I felt these on a spiritual level.

As much fun as I’m having, the more I listen to NO HANDS, the more I come to realize that the top half sets a certain precedent that is only partially met towards the end. With how it starts off so vibrantly energetic with “BUSSIT, “PACKAPUNCH”, and “LIKE A PUNK”, the back half contains the more mellow, flow-oriented vibey songs ala “WHAT U NEED”, “JOHN CENA”, and “OMNITRIX” to close it out. Given the short nature of the record, I do wish that zesty momentum was maintained throughout its entirety, or rather organized a little differently to evenly distribute it across, thus avoiding the end result that is this clearly weighted tracklist. All that being said, those mellowed tracks are still awesome in their own right so detracts from the album very little.

While hip hop duo Joey Valence & Brae may have been skipping science class doing who knows what, they have undeniable chemistry that shines through their witty, unapologetic lyricism and punchy delivery, all of which is elevated by incredible instrumental backdrops. NO HANDS makes for the prime, high-octane summer banger to cruise down the highway with the windows down and without a single care in the world. If I blew my car speakers out listening to this, I wouldn’t even be mad.

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